Goodbye, Leben

In Montag's, and Sonntag and Kessie's cases, I had my final goodbyes with them when i scattered their ashes in the Shenandoah valley and Arctic tundra, respectively.  Because I will save Leben's and Erde's ashes to be scattered with mine, I will make my final goodbyes to Leben with the ritual at his cremation tomorrow.

In addition to driving him out to the crematory and staying by his side till I can take his ashes home with me that night, I will have cremated with him an offering consisting of three tennis balls, a dog biscuit, a photo of me and his sister Erde, and notes from the two us, all contained in a Frosty Paws box. The three tennis balls are there because that's how many he got in his mouth at once.  The photo (shown here) shows me giving him the hand signal he knew for "good dog."  As for the treat and container, I will never forget the look on his face whenever I said, "Who wants a treat?" or "Who wants a Frosty Paws?"

Dear, dear Leben,

Thank you, thank you, thank you, for more than 13 glorious years.  You and your sister, Erde, brought so much joy into my life.  I had no idea that any creature could be as loyal, obedient and noble as you were.  How proud i was to have you by my side.  You were the centerpiece of my life.  Indeed, you were my life, giving truth to the name I chose for you so well.  How lucky I was to be the one to be your and Erde's guardian.  Someday, the three of us shall be together again.  Until then, sleep peacefully, my buddy.  You truly were a good dog, a magnificent dog.  I pray that you can forgive me for the many mistakes i made with you, and that I made up for them.

  

You respected every command i ever gave you during your life here.  But here is the one command  i have been fearing  to give... Run free, you  magnificent dog, run free.

Love, your  human Dad. 

Hey, Bro.  Thanks for 93  fun-filled years.  We sure gave our human dad a run for his money.  I'll take good care of him until I can join you, probably sooner than later, and then our job is done.  Sleep well, my pack mate, until our life here is no more and we are one again with each other and the earth.  Erde.

lll 

Note:  Any errors appearing in this message were caused by the iPad.

Leben, 2001-2014

Two weeks ago, I posted elsewhere that I was quite mindful of how lucky I was to have two healthy German shepherd siblings, Leben and Erde, for more than 13 years.  Today, that luck ran out.  I lost my shadow.  On Monday, two days after Leben swam his weekly quarter mile, and on the day I was to start packing for our 6th road trip together, I discovered a large fast growing tumor on his head.  He was put down at 1:00 p.m. today at home after he rapidly declined over the last four days, lost his pleasant life and started to suffer. After five futile attempts, nature finally found a hideous way to take down his magnificent dog.

I do not think that I have ever bonded with any creature, human or canine, more than I bonded with Leben.  Nor did I ever think that it was possible that a dog could be as loyal and obedient as this magnificent creature was.  If the periods of our lives are cataloged in terms of how we spend our time and whom we love, Leben, and with him his sister Erde, would be the only way I could possibly describe these last 13 years. 

Over the course of Leben's 13 years, we traveled more than 50,000 miles over 250 days on five road-camping trips together, twice reaching the ends of the road in he northeast, in Labrador, and the ends of the road in the northwest in both Alaska and Northwest Territories in Canada, among many other places. The joyous memories Leben and Erde gave me on those trips, and at home, will last me for the rest of my life.

On Monday, I will take Leben to the pet crematory, where I will stay by his side until I can take his ashes home.  His biggest treat in life was to be with me, so I will honor that even in his death. 

I miss that magnificent dog so much already.

ED
8 August 2014

Leben (in wheelchair) and Erde, Nov 2012

Erde and Leben (in wheelchair). Leben walked on his own just fine into the vet hospital for his July 17th disc rupture surgery. He was recovering very slowly from the surgery, but then after several weeks of less than his normal activity he  lost his ability to get up or walk. He is now paralyzed. (We were 2200 miles from home in Thunder Bay, Ontario, when this happened.) So the operation was at best totally unsuccessful or at worst botched. So much for my ever subjecting one of my dogs to this kind of surgery again. At least in Montag’s and Sonntag’s cases, they were unable to walk at the time of their disc rupture surgeries. While there was a chance that Leben might have become paralyzed over the next several years without the surgery, the surgery hastened it for him. In retrospect, I now realize that Leben was not a good candidate for this operation. But we will deal with this just as I did with Sonntag. Leben will tell me when he has crossed the finish line no matter what it takes to get there. When people see Leben and say “poor dog,” I tell them not to feel sorry for him but for the paralyzed dogs that are put down because their guardians cannot or will not manage them.

Background on Leben's spinal problem and paralysis

THIS POSTING IS STILL UNEDITED.

March 29, 2001 – Leben’s birthdate (in Germany).

May 31, 2001 – I adopted Leben (and his sister).

July 2001 – 45-day, 14,500 mile road-camping Leben and Erde to Prudhoe Bay, Alaska, to SF, Ca. then to DC. At Inuvik, Northwest Territories, Canada, Leben started limping in his right front leg. I called vet Jodi Kroch and she gave potential diagnosis of united anconeous. Vet in North Pole, Alaska, also said the same.

September 2001 – At home, vet Rich Bradley (Manassas) diagnosed Leben with uninvited anconeous and performed an ulnectomy. Six months later, x-ray shows it was successful...

August 2002-September 2002– 50-day, 10,000 mile road-camping journey with Leben and Erde. In Nova Scotia, Leben showed signs of limping again.

September 2002 – At home, Rich Bradley diagnosed Leben with fractured correnoid process and OCD (loose cartilage) resulting from ulnectomy and performed surgery to repair.

2006 – Leben shows signs of limping again. Vet Tom Walker (Friendship Animal Hospital) removed loose cartilage in both elbows.

2007- Leben still shows sign of limping in front leg.

2008? - Over the last several years, Leben was sometimes unable to urinate. He was also very difficult to express (his bladder). Dr McConnell of Friendship diagnosed him with enlarged prostate. I decided to continue with my successful remedy of walking him around until he urinates on own. 

May 2010 – I took Leben to Dr Sherman Canap at VOSM for his limping; he put Leben on Previcox. I set up appointment to return in the first week in June.

May 26, 2010 – Leben’s left leg was entirely swollen. Vet at Friendship did nothing; advised me to wait to see VOSM vet the following week. 

May 31, 2010- Leben’s bladder was extremely full and I was unable to express it. I also could not walk him around because of his swollen leg. I rushed him to Friendship. They kept him overnight to see Dr. McConnell next day. Dr McConnell aspirated his leg and diagnosed the cause as a spider bite. He also neutered him to resolve enlarged prostrate problem that led to difficulties in urinating in past.

June 2010 – Returned to Sherman Canap at VOSM to deal with continued limping and whatever the new problem was. An MRI shows more loose cartilage in elbows, stretched left carpus ligament, and some kind of a tear problem with his left shoulder. 

July 2010 – Canap performed laser fusion surgery on left shoulder and removed loose cartilage in both elbows.

September 2010 – Canap performed Stem cell injections on left shoulder and carpus and both elbows.

October 2010 – Just after his recovery from surgery, Leben showed signs of his rear legs splaying on smooth surfaces. He also seems to be hitting the deck (lying down sternum) at every opportunity and reluctance to go on walks. I took him into VOSM about this but they could not find anything wrong orthopedically.

October 2011 – I noticed that returned again to VOSM since the splaying and other symptoms continued. Dr Deb Canap performed several tests (including testing for DM, Degenerative Myelopathy) and all were negative. Since they could find nothing orthopedically wrong, Dr. Christopher recommended seeing their neurologist. (I was reluctant to do that because of the two unsuccessful experiences I had with neurologists with Montag and Sonntag.)

Until now, three signs that something was wrong with Leben are: splaying of rear legs on slippery floors, hitting the deck at every opportunity, and reluctance to go for long walks. There were also signs of wear on the middle toes of both rear legs and occasional signs of fecal incontinence.

May 2012 – Although Leben was not running as fast and as long as he had in the past, he was still able to run. All of a sudden, one day, after running a few steps, he showed signs that something was wrong with his right rear leg and then stop. This continued thereafter. I then made an appointment for July 3^rd to return to VOSM for their opinion.

July 3, 2012 – VOSM did not have me down for the July 3^rd appointment and had no openings for weeks but recommended seeing Dr Ryan Gallagher (their neurologist) that day. Dr Gallagher exiled Leben in his spinal area and noticed some issues. X-rays reveal nothing of significance. He recommended an MRI.

July 11, 2012 – MRI at Vienna Clinic.

July 12, 2012 – I returned to VSOM to review Leben’s MRI with Dr Gallagher. The MRI showed two disc ruptures and serious compression in mid-spine (L2) and very serious compression in lower-spine (L4) (You could not see the spinal column). Dr. Gallagher could not tell if they had calcified, which, if they had, would make the chances of a successful operation less. We discussed the chances of at least preventing further decline because I was convinced that if Leben continued his normal activities, he would become paralyzed (like Montag or Sonntag) over next year. Dr. Gallagher says, “we don’t experiment on dogs”, meaning there is a good chance of success even if ruptures had calcified. Even just opening a window in the bone onto the spine could offer some decompression relief; removing some of calcified stuff might help too by allowing additional room for decompression. Dr. Gallagher offered two options: “conservative management” or surgery to remove the debris from the ruptures. I asked about the recovery period for the surgery because of the road trip I had planned with my dogs and was told that in four weeks he Leben would be back to normal activity and would b able to make the trip. I asked what the downside of the surgery would be and Dr. Gallagher said “he could be worse”. With regard to the timing of the surgery, I told Dr. Gallagher I had three choices: do it now and postpone the trip until at least four weeks after the surgery; do it in October after I came back from the trip; or no surgery at all and just wait and see what happens and decide then. The meeting had to be cut short because Dr Gallagher had another appointment.

July 13, 2012 – The next day, after watching Leben running after he got out of the pool at Middleburg (he stopped abruptly after three or four steps); I decided to go ahead with surgery now. If “conservative management” meant no running at all or climbing up steps, etc., I knew that that was not a possibility. I also thought that if nothing was done now to at least prevent further decline, Leben would take another step down sometime over the next year, and if I left for the trip and he took another step down on the trip, I would want to rush back for the surgery. Although I was not optimistic that Leben’s situation would be improved by the surgery, I was convinced that either further decline could be avoided or the operation would not produce any benefits at all, which a risk worth was taking. Except for that one statement, made almost as a footnote, that “he could be worse”, I was not aware of any downside risks associated with the operation. In Montag’s case, he was lame going into his operation and lame coming out; in Sonntag’s case, he as paralyzed going into his operation and paralyzed coming out. Going into his operation, Leben was walking okay and able to climb steps, and I expected that he would be the same after the operation, that is, until he took another step down if the operation was unsuccessful in avoiding that.

July 17, 2012 – Gallagher performed surgery on Leben. Dr. Gallagher called me after and said that the operation took 4.5 hours. The good news was that the right L4 area was a fresh rupture and he was able to clean it out pretty well. The left side, however, was calcified and he was able to chip away a good amount. He also said he went ahead with surgery at the L2 area, which was less serious than L4, although still serious, but both sides were completely calcified and he could only chip away at a little. Gallaher said he did not want to go any further as he did not want to manipulate the attached nerves too much.

July 18-19 2010 – I visited Leben in hospital. He was able to get up on his own but was in bad shape otherwise. He could not walk without support. Dr. Gallagher says it was not a matter of if there would be wobbling, but how much. He could not urinate on his own and was leaking. Although Dr. Gallagher said I could pick Leben up the next day, I decided to wait until Friday, July 20, to pick him up because he could not urinate on his own yet and I knew that his bladder is extremely difficult to express. The techs agreed to it were difficult to express his balder and so they were cauterizing him.

July 20, 2012 – I picked Leben up. Although he was more alert then he had been the previous two days, he was still in very bad shape. He could get up on his own but his wobble was so terrible he needed to be supported when walking. He still cannot urinate on own. He is leaking all the time. Dr. Gallagher said he had never seen a case where this urination problem continued this long. 

July 22 – Dr Gallagher prescribed Bethanachol and Phenoxybenzamine for Leben’s bladder control issues.

On July 22^nd, I moved to Karen Hamrick’s cottage in Virginia where it was easier to manage Leben than at home in condo where walk outside means long walks and up steps. I stayed in the cabin for three weeks until Leben was able to walk on his own.

On August 1^st, I started Leben on once-a-week therapy at VOSM (laser, massage, then underwater treadmill when his skin infection cleared up). I also took him to acupuncture once a week at Southpaws (Dr. Hoary and Dr. Cogency), and swimming twice a week (for 15 minutes or more) at the Animal Swim Center in Middleburg. I also gave him home therapy three times a day as prescribed, keep him confined, and took him only on short leash walks. I continued the VOSM, swimming and acupuncture therapy until the first week in September.

I took Leben back to Dr. Gallagher for rechecks two and four weeks after surgery.

During Leben’s rehab, I kept a “scorecard” on at how Leben was doing compared to where he was when he went in for the surgery. He was not improving very rapidly. At the two week point, Leben was nowhere near 25% of where he was before the surgery and his bladder control problem was controllable only by the medicines. (Once, when I took him off the meds, his bladder problem returned.)

August 1, 2012 – At the first recheck at 2 weeks at VOSM, Dr. Gallagher said that he thought Leben was doing better than he expected. I was still concerned because I do not see any serious recovery and because of his urination problem and Dr. Gallagher said that it could be eight weeks before he recovered (to where he was before the operation). Because of Leben’s slow recovery and his urination problem, I started to get concerned that the operation chipped away at too many critical nerves, including Leben’s bladder control nerves. Dr. Gallaher admitted that the L2 area does control bladder functions.

During one of my acupuncture sessions, after Leben was walking on his own, poorly, but walking, Dr. Hoary pointed out that Leben’s left rear leg was in worst condition than his right. Since I had not seen that for myself since both looked in bad shape, I was surprised to hear that at that since it was his right leg that I thought was problematic. As I watched this carefully after that, I saw that she was right. He would only bring his left leg up to the front only so far and then would abruptly stop. This was in addition to the terrible wobble to both legs that persisted.

 

Ageist 15, 2012 – Second/final rechecks at VOSM. Dr Gallagher advised an eight-week recovery period before resuming normal activity, and also said that recover of strength could take many months. (Of course, had I known that that was a possibility, I would not have gone ahead with the surgery as Leben’s life expectancy is 12, and that would surpass it?) Leben was still not even at the half-way point of recovering to where he was going into the operation. Dr Gallagher did not advise against the upcoming trip but suggested I not let him chase any moose, bear, or wolves.

At the end of the revised recovery period of 8 weeks, Leben was able to get up on own, walk without support, climbs steps and stay standing. But he had not made any progress that I could see since week four. Both legs were still very wobbly.

September 17, 2012 – I left on road-camping trip with Leben and Erde. Knowing that the operation was probably unsuccessful since the disc ruptures had calcified, my plan was to manage Leben conservatively.

September 20, 2012 – After the first few days on the trip, I determined that Leben was able to take walks, so I took him for a 1.7 mile walk up a grassy jeep trail. He was able to do on his own without difficulty. Up and back took six hours, with a two-hour break in between. I supported him with a sling the last portion of the trip to make sure he did not fall. The next day, he was fine, and he continued that way for the next three weeks. But he was not improving. It was easier to manage him on the road than it would have been at home because he did not have to walk as much. He was able to take steps, and slight slopes. I kept all his walks short. For longer walks, I put him in the dog stroller I had brought along.

October 3, 2012 – At Killarney Park, Leben took a short step down to the beach area. When he went to climb back up what should have been an easy step for him, he fell down. He could not get back up on his own. After I helped him up, he continued on his own with no trouble, although our walks were short.

October 6, 2012 – I noticed that Leben was no longer scratching himself to show me where his skin allergy was bothering him. I did not know it at the time but he was not scratching himself because he actually was no longer able to, at least with his left rear leg. He was also showing signs of having difficulty maneuvering himself on the tent mattress.

October 7, 2012 - Leben started to fall when walking, always the left leg. He would always fall to his left. At that point, I started to support him with a sling or take him in his stroller. He was getting less activity on the trip than he would have at home so I knew that just normal activity or less was getting to him. But he was still able to get up on his own, albeit slowly.

October 8, 2012 – Leben was no longer able to get up on his own. I decided to end the trip and head fiord Thunder Bay and started the return trip from there to get him into swim therapy. I stayed in Kolas the entire trip home as it was easier to

October 12, 2012 – I sent e-mail to Dr Gallagher asking has advice on what to do about Leben.

October 13, 2012 – I arrive home and started to take Leben swimming 3x weekly the next day.

October 17, 2012 – I sent another e-mail to Dr. Gallagher.

October 19, 2012 – After I had not heard from Dr Gallagher, I emailed Sherman Canap. Dr Gallagher responds within few hours. He asked me to bring Leben in on Monday, October 23.

Leben’s left leg situation seemed to be deteriorating by the day. He showed no signs of strength in it at all and was unable to tend on it even when propped up.

October 22, 2012 – I took Leben to Dr. Gallagher at VOSM. X-rays showed that there were no bone factures or infections, the inflammation from which could cause the problem we were seeing. He agreed that the fall on Oct 3^rd occurred outside the healing period (Leben had taken similar falls during the early healing period with no resulting problems) and so that should not have been a problem. He advised steroids (with side effects) to reduce any inflammation or an MRI to see if something else occurred. He agreed that an MRI would be useful if I intoned to go ahead with surgery to fix any underlying problem, a new problem, scar tissue, etc... He has no explanation for what is going on but agrees that Leben’s neurologic signs are worse.

Since the last visit to VOSM, Leben’s left rear leg has deteriorated more. He cannot place his toes, he cannot stand on it, when swimming he uses it very little, when walking in the harness or wheelchair he hardly uses it . He can move his right leg somewhat when walking in the harness or wheelchair and when swimming, and he can scratch himself with it, but his toe placement is poor. Whatever happened to him affected is left leg significantly and his right leg somewhat. He is, to all intents and purposes, now paralyzed. So the operation I subjected Leben to in order prevent him from becoming paralyzed eventually, might actually have caused his paralysis in 11 weeks.

What happened to Leben?

While I have no idea what caused Leben’s two disc ruptures, there are four possibilities for what contributed to his paralysis.

1- This is that next step down that I was hoping to avoid by putting Leben through the surgery. That is, the surgery was not only unsuccessful in improving his situation, but it was unsuccessful in preventing any further decline.

2- Something traumatic happened (a fall, etc.) at some point in or after the healing period that caused this paralysis, i.e., next step down.

3- Inflammation of some kind. Inflammation from an infection or fracture has been ruled out, leaving inflammation from scar tissue from the operation.

4- The surgery was too aggressive and chipped away at too many critical nerves and made the remaining nerves vulnerable to simply normal activity.

I know my dog. I knew his movements before the surgery and knew every movement he took after the surgery as I was with him for, literally, 24/7 after that. What happened was not (#1) the next step down that I was hoping to avoid with the surgery. Likewise, nothing traumatic happened (#2) during healing (recovery) period or afterwards that caused this. Leben got nothing more than normal activity after the surgery. When he fell on October 3^rd, that was the first sign that the recovery had failed and not the cause of the failure. His left leg is now the major part of his paralysis. It was fine going into the surgery. Dr. Khoury noticed weeks after the surgery that his left leg was problematic. Something happened during the surgery started this chain of events that led to this. 

In retrospect, Leben was not a good candidate for this surgery. The signs of a problem started to show up two years before the surgery, more than enough time for the calcification to take place. The surgery was not supposed to be heroic. I am not too sure what I would have done if I had been told that Leben was not a good candidate for the surgery because of when the symptoms first started to show up and other things, but I was not interested in heroic surgery. Either the surgery was too aggressive in chipping away at critical nerves, which would explain Leben’s immediate loss of bladder control, failure to recover significantly, and new left rear leg problem, or created scar tissue which is causing inflammation. Had I been aware of either of these risks, I would not have gone ahead with the surgery given Leben’s age and other things. The only reason it is helpful to understand these things is to determine where I go from here, a routine of prednisone to reduce inflammation, another MRI and maybe surgery, or put Leben in a wheelchair. In retrospect, I should have opted for waiting for the next step down to take place on its own and put Leben in a wheelchair immediately if it did instead of subjecting Leben to the weeks of hell he and I went through during his recovery period. His paralysis and accompanying problems (no bladder control) now is probably worse than it would have been had it occurred on its own, although I will never know that for sure. All of this is no longer of concern to me because now I have to make do with the dog I have and give him as full a life as I can, and I will. But the bottom line, for which I take full responsibility, is that the surgery itself brought on Leben’s paralysis faster than it would have occurred on its own over the next year or so. This is the first time in my own personal experience, with my dogs or myself, where an operation or medical procedure caused or contributed to a worse outcome than going in.

A message to a friend about Leben's current situation

I got back into D.C. the evening of Saturday, October 13^th, and, just 12 hours later, picked up with my usual Sunday routine with my dogs and the Sunday papers at Dean and Deluca, albeit two hours later than usual.

Although Leben (my male dog) had not recovered even half his walking ability compared to where he was before his July 17^th surgery (he was walking okay then, but walking), we went ahead with the trip 10 weeks after the surgery and weeks after the conclusion of the healing period with the vet’s concurrence, qualified only by the vet’s moving target for Leben’s recovery from the surgery: first four weeks, then eight weeks, then “many months.” It was actually easier for Leben and for me to manage him on the road since his walks each day were for the most part just a step outside the tent or Land Rover. He was holding his own fairly well, although not really recovering further.

We set up camp in the best sites in seven fantastic Canadian provincial/national parks around the Great Lakes, where we were often the only campers. We had the wilderness all to ourselves, except for the bears, fox, wolves, raccoons, squirrels, and chipmunks. (Not one pesky insect this year.) Of course, this was understandable considering that the temperature at night dipped to the 20s (we had snow several times) and was rarely above 34 at reveille. (Our trip blog was www.ontheroad-2012.blogspot.com)

Unfortunately, three weeks into the trip, over a period of three days, I watched Leben struggle to get up, walk, scratch himself with his rear legs, or even stay standing on his own. His surgery recovery had failed. He is now paralyzed. Since Leben never got back to where he was on the morning before his surgery even on the vet’s stretched recovery schedule, my guess is what happened is that the vet’s well-intentioned but aggressive, four and a half hour surgery chipped away a lot of Leben’s critical mid- and lower-spine nerves and shifted the remaining nerves to make them vulnerable to even conservative normal activity, which best describes his activity on the trip. This probably would have happened sooner at home because conservative normal activity there home would have involved much more than he got on the trip. The vet, of course, does not blame the surgery, but a fall Leben had on October 3rd. A “chicken and egg” dilemma. (I believe Leben fell because his situation was deteriorating already.) The facts that the operation took away Leben’s bladder control, that never advanced beyond the half-way point at four weeks, and that a simple fall 10 weeks after the surgery, far less than the falls he took in the days after surgery as he tried to walk, would cause the paralysis that I hoped to avoid by having the surgery, tell me that the operation was not only unsuccessful in improving Leben’s situation or preventing any further decline, and, worse, probably set Leben up for paralysis sooner. Regardless, I put Leben through the surgery because after reviewing his MRI, knowing what happened to two of my prior male German shepherds, Montag and Sonntag, and seeing the three steps down Leben had taken over the last two years, I was convinced that that Leben would become paralyzed sometime over the next year and that there was a decent chance the surgery could avoid that. (I also knew that he was a chance that the surgery could “make Leben worse”, as the vet told me.) So, Leben is where I expected him to be over the next year without the surgery, but at the cost of 10 hellish weeks for him and more than $15,000. But if that fall on October 3^rd was indeed the cause Leben’s paralysis, and that fall would not have taken place at home under conservative management, which is doubtful, I have no regrets about taking that journey with him and his sister Erde because it was or would have been my last trip with him as a walking dog. And what a trooper he was. And who knows? Maybe if he had not had the surgery, he might have become paralyzed on the trip anyway.

We were 2200 miles from home in Thunder Bay, Ontario, when this happened and, needless to say, the trip home was not a walk in the park. Having been down this road before, though, we made it home successfully, and now all three of us begin a new journey, an entirely new life than the one we left on September 17^th. Of course, as the world’s unsolicited (unwelcomed and undeserved) poster guy for managing a wheelchair-bound paralyzed dog thanks to the two National Geographic articles on my previous paralyzed dog, I have no choice but to keep Leben keep here. But you do not have to get to that since that’s the decision I would have made anyway. This dog has been the consummate loyal, obedient dog, and now it’s my turn to reciprocate. I get him around in a large dog stroller until his wheelchair arrives next week. The truth is that I am thrilled that I am this dog’s guardian now because if this was fated for him and he was most others’ dog, he would no longer be with us. I have already promised him what I promised Sonntag, that I will not put him down because he is a large dog and difficult to manage. I kept my promise to Sonntag, and I will keep it with Leben. We will make it to his finish line together no matter what it takes, except more surgery, of course.

I am no longer concerned about what happened to Leben at or after his surgery, or what would have happened without the surgery. He is paralyzed and no one knows what his chances are for recovery, if any. I am now concerned only with giving him a full life and managing him as a paralyzed dog, which takes six to nine hours a day, the latter when I take him swimming three days a week in Middleburg, Virginia. My three main goals at this point are to keep up his spirit simply by doing everything we did before, albeit differently, to learn how to manage him successfully and either stick with that or improve it, and not to neglect his magnificent sister, Erde. There are and will be other goals, but those three take up a lot of time right now. I hope to keep up this blog about our  new journey for the benefit of those who are faced with a similar situation.

Despite the unwelcome ending to our journey, the ending could have been worse. And nothing will detract from the absolutely extraordinary trip it was in so many respects, for all of us, including Leben. This one for sure will turn out to have been a life-changer. One life-change that I know for sure is that I will never subject any dog of mine to spinal surgery again, having struck out three times now, once, in Leben’s case, where the dog came out worse than when he went in. In the future, I will wait until paralysis occurs and then go immediately to a wheelchair. Sonntag led a full, active life in his wheelchair for three and a half years. Leben is about to do the same for his full life. Why the vets do not suggest this as an option I do not know. Why I did not chose that option myself with Sonntag and now with Leben, I also do not know. But that it no longer a concern of mine either.

October 22,2012

Leben's vet responded to my e-mails on Friday and I brought Leben in for a recheck today. He confirmed that Leben's neurological signs are worse than when he saw him at the last (4-week) recheck.  Xrays showed that it wasn't some kind of a fracture, nor was it an infection, both of which could have contributed to this turn of events.  This means that the underlying problem is neurological. The two options at this point are, first,   try a course of steroids (prednizone) to see if that reduces any inflammation that may be causing the problem.  The problems with this are the terrible side effects, the chance that it will do nothing, and the chances that Leben's situation will continue to decline, and then we are back to square one.  The second option is  another MRI to see what might have shifted since the July 11th MRI.  But the MRI would only be informational since there is no way I am going to subject this magnificent dog to any more surgery, which would could very well be unsuccessful, too.  We explored several scenarios as to why this happened and wy Leben's recovery from the trauma of the surgery was slow (not that it makes any difference) and came up with nothing conclusive. I raised the issue of a wheelchair (canine cart) for Leben and the vet said that would help with his mobility (outside).  In other words, the vet has no idea what the best course of action to take. So I am on my own. I will, of course, keep at the intensive (thrice-weekly)  swim therapy and maybe  acupuncture with the hope that Leben's situation improves and then putting him in his wheelchair when it arrives next week.  Perhaps I will try the steroids too after that time, but to gain what? Knowing that Sonntag led a very full and active life for 3+ years in a wheelchair, my guess is that I will put Leben  in the  wheelchair when it arrives to see how he takes to it.  Since Leben's life at home consisted of waiting by the door for me to return and  following me around from room to room, managing him at home will be easy, i.e., I will just move him to wherever I will be.  If he does not take to his wheelchair well, I will continue doing what I am doing now with the harness and strollers.  This dog is not going to be put down because he cannot walk and it is tough to manage a large paralyzed dog, which is the reason you see virtually no large dogs in wheelchairs, except for the initial photos after their wheelchairs arrive..

Incidentally, Leben developed an ear infection sometime over the last week or so. I discovered it myself because I did not realize that Leben could not use his back legs anymore to scratch himself.  (On the trip, I thought his not scratching  was a sign that his skin infection was disappearing, but it was a sign of his neurological decline. In fact, it was the first sign, and I missed it.) In treating him for the infection, his regular vet examined him for his neurological signs and said, "I think Leben is going to have to use a wheelchair for the rest of his life."  I appreciated her candor.

My main goal over the next several weeks will be to learn how to manage the new situation, not only Leben's new life style but Erde's as well, and then my own.  In keeping Leben's spirit high, may aim is to make him think that this new life, where he is being treated like a king, is one that he deserved for being such a good dog.  Erde already thought she deserved the life of a queen so her special treatment comes as no surprise to her.  "It's about time," is what she is probably thinking.

For  postings from our recent road trip that included  Leben's situation, please go to www.ontheroa-2012.blogspot.com

My emails to Dr. Gallagher

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